Marriage Math

April Showers, May Flowers, June Brides - So you like numbers! Me too. Actually math was one of my better subjects in school growing up. I have learned that there are three types of people in the world: Those who like math and those who don't. (Thanks JMR) I liked math but I kept it pretty basic, no advanced math topics or calculus. My enjoyment of math was due to me keeping the bar pretty low. I can add and subtract with the best of them.

Twenty-Five or Six To Four - This is totally subjective, but it comes from my heart and I hope you know I believe it with all my heart...I want to share with you three of the biggest problems facing married couples today and Bible numbers that will solve each one. If we would look at "problems" like we use to in math class, maybe we'd be more apt to work at solving them. In school, I could control the level of math I was challenged with. But in life there is no such luxury. Marriage is tested by the nastiest word problems this school can think up. But solve them you can. With flying colors!

One Is The Loneliest Number - The first problem facing marriage is SELF. You make marriage difficult! Your will, your agenda, your needs, your priorities, your opinions, your pleasure, your timing - all will test the health and unity of your marriage. Every day you must attend a funeral to self. Your needs are only met through the laying down your life for your spouse. So what is the number of marriage?

Ecclesiastes 5:9-12 "Two are better than one, because they have a good
return for their work; If one falls down (the other) can help him up, but pity
the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together,
they will keep warm. But how can one be warm alone? Though one can be
overpowered, two can defend themselves."


Tea For Two - So it's the number two, right? It would appear to be, but listen to the last line of Solomon's equation: "A chord of three strands is not easily broken" There it is. THREE is the number that overcomes self. The day each of us accepted Christ as our personal Savior and Lord we died to self (This is assuming that you and your partner are both Christian, if not you've got a different problem!). Jesus is your Lord. When you married you brought another into the equation so the number is three not two. Which is a good thing because without putting Christ first it would really be difficult to experience the selfless nature marriage requires. As a Christian you have already forfeited your rights, your will, your plans...you get the idea. Plus, as a Christian you have already learned that it is okay to do so. That to save your life you must lose your life. To get you must give. To be first you must be last. That's the "new" math! The number is not one, not two, but three.

Like A Band Aid - The second problem facing marriage is HURT. You are going to offend and hurt each other. It's inevitable. You see things differently, you say things differently, and you feel things differently...and as you figure that out there will be hurt. But that is only part of the hurt equation. Also lurking is past hurt (not from each other). It's called baggage. The hurts we bring into the marriage. Since we're piling it on, there is another source of hurt that will cause problems in your marriage. Stepping outside the threshold of your loving marriage is the bitter cold shoulder of the world. Your boss or a co-worker is going to offend you, a driver is going to cut you off, a politician isn't going to keep their promise and guess where you take all those hurts? Back across the threshold to your humble abode. And they fester. So add it up that's a lot of hurt! So what is the Bible's answer?

"Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, 'Lord, how many times shall I forgive
my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?' Jesus answered, 'I tell
you, not seven times, but seventy times seven." Matthew 18:21-22


Smarter Than A Sixth Grader - FOUR HUNDRED-NINETY, right? Peter's sum represented keeping score, and oh how we love to keep score! Most of us can keep track of seven on our fingers (even with a couple of industrial accidents). Jesus' figure represents health & happiness. It's who we are rather than what we do! We must learn and practice forgiveness every single day. Hurts don't just go away. And every hurt is detrimental to the health and happiness of our marriage. Forgiveness is essential. The number is not seven it's four hundred-ninety!

Jesus Abolished The Law - The third problem facing marriage is FINANCES. Experts tell us this is the number one problem facing married couples today. Christian and non-Christian alike. Right across the board. So what is the Bible answer?

Then Jacob made a vow saying, "If God will be with me and will watch over
me on this journey I am taking and will give me food to eat and clothes to wear
so that I return safely to my father's house, then the Lord will be my God and
this stone I have set up as a pillar will be God's house, and of all that you
give me I will give you a tenth." Genesis 28:20-22


Prayer Of Jabez Has Nothing On The Prayer Of Jacob - The number to remember is TEN. Weddings are fun because every single person attending wants what is best for you. They give gifts, advice and encouragement. They pick out something that they have enjoyed and just want you to have it, too. The best I have to offer you is this: Tithe! Give your first and best to God. Dedicate all you have as from the Giver of all things and honor him. Be trustworthy with His wealth. Be a conduit of support for His Kingdom. It will forever solve the problem of finances in your marriage. Guaranteed (Malachi 3:10)!

Pop Quiz -The test won't go away until we graduate from this earth. When your trust is in God like Jacob, you can face anything. Jacob was a wealthy man, he had done pretty good for himself...but Jacob was smart. Like the other Patriarchs of the Bible, Jacob knew it could all be lost in a moment. But God is faithful. Jacob didn't know anything about Moses' Law. But He knew of the example of Abel, Noah and his Grandpa Abraham. After Twenty-Five years of marriage I know it to be true too. I was smart enough to heed the advice of those who told me the same.

Three - Four Hundred-Ninety - Ten - Go For It!